joed1989

Archive for June, 2011|Monthly archive page

I dreamed an MTV series.

In Uncategorized on June 30, 2011 at 10:29 am

I’d say it’s a pretty safe bet that I have the most vivid and ridiculous dreams of anyone I know.

Last night, probably fueled by the late night Taco Bell and Kix before bed, I had one of the strangest. It was actually a 2-part dream, tied together by the fact that I turned out to be watching these 2 dreams as a TV show on MTV. What that show was, I don’t really understand. All I know is 3-4 people died. My dreams are a little gruesome sometimes.

Let me interject: I don’t think dreams tell us about our suppressed thoughts or are a window into the future, I believe (most scientifically) that dreams are your brains way of vomiting out all of the things that you have seen and have happened to you the day (or a few days) before.

In the first part of the dream, which, oddly enough, featured Taye Diggs, I was a teenage girl at a neighborhood in the mountains with her family. What do families do when they’re on vacation? That’s right; they put on plays with the locals.

The night before opening night, the director hosted a party for the cast and their family and friends, so my actual extended family and some random people who were apparently my best friends were there.

The party ended when the director shot Taye Diggs. The police came and killed him, at which point everyone scattered, except me and my “best friend” and his sister. We were making PB&J sandwiches in the kitchen, when I saw the director’s ghost messing with the radiator. I tried to get my friends out, but they didn’t believe me so I had to run out alone and drive as fast as I could down the mountain before the house exploded.

That’s when I realized I was just watching this story on TV and the girl in the show wasn’t actually vacationing with her family, but she was at a mental institution, which she had blown up and was running away from. Maybe I did wake up at that point and noticed the TV was on, and upon falling back to sleep, incorporated it into my dream.

I told you it was ridiculous.

The second part was much shorter and not as crazy. This episode was about another teenage girl who was at a gym for dance classes. The instructor was the mother of her best friend, who was also in the class, and they were planning an outing that weekend at her pool. The class ended and everyone walked into the hallway, at which point the instructor dropped dead of a heart attack.

And that was that.

 

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Easy like Susan Lucci

In Uncategorized on June 26, 2011 at 7:34 pm

Imagine good ol’ Lionel singing that!

I was watching Home Shopping Network (HSN) today and saw that Susan Lucci was promoting Malibu Pilates (a workout product) and it seemed like something I would actually use. Considering my current weight situation (fat), it’s more like something I need, but $329 is a little bit more money than I have right now. Like $328 more.

Speaking (writing?) of money, I finally dug my sewing machine out from the heap of crap that it was under, so I’m going to try to sell some things on Etsy. The only problem is, gee whiz, I don’t know what to make. Tote bags? Stuffed animals? Quilts? Underwear? I just don’t know!

Seeing as though this will probably be my only source of income this summer, since I haven’t gotten a job yet (even though I applied at, at least a dozen places. It sure stinks trying to find a job when I’m only home for another 2 months.

All I know is, it sure isn’t easy like Susan Lucci.

In closing, I welcome your feedback on what I should offer to the millions of potential customers awaiting my arrival on Etsy. Or the two people that will happen upon my page and feel sorry for me. You know, whichever.

Random songs I’ve had stuck in my head today

In Uncategorized on June 23, 2011 at 7:51 pm

I seem to always have the most ridiculous songs stuck in my head; most often while I’m in the shower. Here are a couple examples from today:

“Da Dip.”
That “Deep in the Heart of Texas” song.

Pretty diverse duo, eh? If they were people, they’d for sure have a sitcom.

I did nothing today.

In Uncategorized on June 21, 2011 at 8:31 pm

Well, maybe not nothing. I let my dogs outside a couple times, ate a few meals, ate a few too many snacks, talked to my best friend Emily on Skype (out of respect for her privacy, I won’t tell you that her last name is Port. Oops.), looked up plane tickets to visit her, played some Minecraft, watched Grey’s Anatomy, and…well, that’s about it.

I did nothing exciting today, I suppose I should say.

The days seem to all turn out in some variation of this lately. “Get a job!”, you might say. I’ve been trying, smart ass. Apparently three and a half years of retail experience isn’t enough to get a job somewhere.

I never thought I’d be one of those people that writes about not having anything to write about, but here we are. Whatevs.

I’ll leave you with this:

Things that have happened since the last time I posted…

In Uncategorized on June 21, 2011 at 12:20 am

In no particular order…
I got contacts.
I finished my third year of college.
I started taking a multivitamin.
I got an internship with a media company.
My best friend moved to California.
I started working out.
I stopped working out.
I changed my underwear at least once.

I’m particularly proud of that last one.

That’s about it for now, but expect more later, once I change my underwear…